Last week, I shared a few ideas about what we can do should boredom ever darken our door, perhaps the blue or yellow-framed door of our new home in Portugal. Bear with me, if this is an unthinkable scenario for you, should you be new in your Portuguese adventure, and even unimaginable if you’re at the contemplation or planning stage of a new life here.
The good and reassuring news, the explanation for this preposterous notion, from my own personal experience, is that it’s not Portugal that becomes dull or no longer engaging, it’s more that the human mind has a habit of turning the marvellous into the mundane – in a protective and normalising reflex – a survival strategy, which we can of course on a more basic level be thankful for.
I believe this to be observable wherever and however we live, and as we can see from the best and worst of human behaviour and situations, prolonged exposure to any circumstance can ultimately become a ‘new normal’. Whether it’s a war zone or the most luxurious life we humans can create or imagine, we have this incredible ability to get used to what’s going on around us, as ‘life goes on’.
There’s the story of two young fish who, going about their business as tiddlers on the ocean floor do, encounter an older fish swimming in the opposite direction. “Morning lads,” says the more mature ‘peixe’, asking: “How are you finding the water today?” The two young fishy fellas swim on, and after a while, one turns to the other, somewhat bemused, and utters: “What on earth is water?”
The point here is that whatever the circumstances we ‘swim’ in, and become so imperceivably close to, are the ones we may ultimately become used to, even bored of, unless action is taken to derail this most basic, though instinctively useful, mental mechanism.
At this stage, the list of activities offered in last week’s column may be of some benefit, offering diversion and contrast. But having created such a list, I realised – as soon as I’d sent the copy to our esteemed editor – that there is something much more fundamental at stake here, that the more introspective and spiritual reader may have been aware of.
I shall return to what I now call the ‘supreme state of retirement’ as I endeavour to pull the various threads of thought expressed here so far together into a stunning literary climax, but before that, I have another shock to share with and prepare you for.
As well as the possibility of a bad and unexpected case of ennui, I feel it necessary to talk also of (cue guitar and harmonica) the ‘expat blues’ – a condition that can strike as suddenly and surprisingly as ‘the dull of the daily’, if you don’t keep your wits about you, and to some extent, prepare for their unwanted arrival.
The expat blues (no, not the obscure Bob Dylan album, which never saw the light of day, because it was too depressing even by his standards) are doubly awful. In the first instance, our minds have been focused almost exclusively on upside and positivity in all the time and effort it’s taken to get here, and once any sadness or sourness does arise, we can deeply resent any negativity that shows its ugly face, here in our Portuguese promised land.
Of course, a move of country alone, albeit to a delightful country such as this, is no panacea for eternal peace and happiness. Yet we can and should forgive ourselves for such naivety and hopefulness, especially if it was part of the driving force that got us here. But here we are, and occasionally angst, anxiety and even depression can beset us, because ‘wherever we go there we are’ and ‘with luggage come baggage’, for all who migrate, however optimistic they are.
The lightbulb of our new lives that once glowed like a magnificent Portuguese lighthouse, and that we expected to shine evermore, will face metaphorical wind and rain, the inescapable elements that make up life’s changing conditions, prompting routine maintenance, the occasional wipe, or even a complete change.
The ultimate state of retirement I mentioned earlier, the ‘Zen of Migration’ if you like, is the ability to be still enough, not bored, to experience, not endure, whatever is going on in our lives at any time. I believe we have put ourselves at a great advantage by placing ourselves in this country and culture, but that advantage is not an indemnity, as we discover when life’s slings and arrows still find us amid the sun and ‘natas’.
When they do, take comfort in these helpful surroundings, as you process the inevitability of the human experience, and transcend again the trappings of your own mind. A life in Portugal will give you lemons, one way or another, good and bad, so lemonade is guaranteed here. What I mean to say is that – contrary to our vainest expectations – pain will come, but suffering is optional.
Alongside, last week’s list of more physical and ‘outer’ activities, I might have added learning meditation or developing mindfulness as options for when boredom, or worse still, the expat blues envelop or undermine any of us. Migration is, like all things ultimately, an ‘inner game’. It is only when we understand our inner workings as much as we have grasped the outer requirements for a successful life in Portugal, that a true and deep harmony in our lives can emerge.
“The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven,” said John Milton in Paradise Lost.
When your Portuguese paradise feels lost, remember that it only really takes one expat to change the lightbulb that has either dimmed or is done-for in your life here. And that expat, foreigner, immigrant is YOU. When we change our minds (or stop believing them so rigidly), we change our lives, which can be as easy as flicking a light-switch.
Many hands ‘make light work’ of course, so develop a supportive network of friends and sources of inspiration to lift your spirits, when the need arises, to return you to the wonder of life in Portugal – which never went anywhere, by the way, apart from out of your mindful awareness and conscious reach.
By Carl Munson
Carl Munson is host of the Good Morning Portugal! show every weekday on YouTube and creator of www.learnaboutportugal.com, where you can learn something new about Portugal every day!
