By Dra Helena Capelo features@algarveresident.com
Dr Helena Capelo is a Psychologist and Specialist In Andrology, now working at the Hospital Particular in Gambelas, Faro.
Andrology is the study of the male genital tract and is the science and practice that deals with the male reproductive functions, including disturbances and dysfunctions.
Sexuality and our relationship with others are often ways of identifying our existential problems.
Patients with a sexual dysfunction have a certain tendency to assume that the source of their problem is biological; therefore they define a direct and unquestionable line between sexuality and reproduction.
However, the aim of this article is to express the correlation between sexual expression and identity.
Sexuality is a basic way of us projecting ourselves to the world and towards others through our bodies. But sexuality is more than just sex or the occasional sexual date. In fact, it is a proof of life in itself. We are able to manifest our existence by using our body as a vehicle.
Our body is not only a living organ, but also a communication tool for past experiences in the psychological scope.
Sexual encounters provide us with a pivotal means with which to express our presence to ‘the other’ and, in turn, to express the presence of ‘the other’ to ourselves.
Sexuality gives us a meaning to life – it provides a source of information about the way we see the world and about the way we position ourselves within it and in our relationship with others. Through sexuality, we express our choices, hesitations, pleasures and anxieties.
The physiological or physical sexual necessity in a relationship between humans is, on its own, not sufficient.
We use our sexuality as a way to express and avoid anxieties in our relationships, but while doing so it also prevents other ways of communication/dialogue. Therefore we have sexuality as an identity, as a means of communication.
One’s upbringing imposes limits and boundaries that make us dissociate from experiences surrounding us, including of course our sexual experiences.
When we associate attitude and behavior with sexual identity, we impose rules in our sexual behaviour to give us a sense of security (however limiting and problematic that proves).
The culture we live in presents sexuality as a product, placing great importance in the ‘now’, which is an enemy for our success – we aren’t machines!
The relationship between ourselves, our bodies and our sexuality and the way we position ourselves within the world may make it extremely difficult for a patient to relate to his/her psychologist and vice versa.
Our image of sexuality and how it is articulated between people may provide an interesting alternative to specialist forms of sex therapies.
Psychotherapy can be of great help in bringing to light the true reasons behind certain sexual disturbances and, in this way, contribute to their cure.
Therapy can be done individually or as a couple.
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